I made a fresh batch of dark chocolate Guinness ice cream to take over to the boys for dinner. The boys – also known as The Running Gays – are a group of health-conscious athletes who are best described by the meme-card below.
Naturally, when I brought out the half gallon of ice cream, as quickly as everyone’s eyes had widened with excitement so did their hands shoot up in defense.
“Oh, I – I’m okay.”
“Wow, you MADE ice cream? Sure, I’ll try a tiny bit.”
“I would, but I’m so full.”
I didn’t take it personally. I packed a half gallon, fully expecting a lukewarm reception. But everyone was gracious and sampled the ice cream to be polite. The ice cream went around the table once as we chatted and again as we continued the conversation. Then suddenly, someone returned the empty container to the middle of the table. The ice cream was gone. From freezer to table, it took about eight minutes for them to finish a half gallon. Even my brother liked it, which was pretty wild since he’s the grown version of Mikey, the Life cereal kid. He doesn’t typically like chocolate or beer or getting fat.
The point of this story is really just self-validation. Now, on to the technical stuff.
This recipe is primarily an ice cream and secondarily a milkshake. If you’re planning on finishing it in a couple of days, keep it as an ice cream. If you’re going to store it longer, make shakes, instead. Homemade ice cream is like a breeding ground for ice crystals. A couple of days will turn velvety ice cream into a granita. So, if by some unholy miracle, there’s any left over beyond five days, add a tiny bit of milk and make a milkshake!
For boring and detailed notes, scroll past the recipe. Otherwise, just trust me.
I needed more chocolate because I doubled the recipe.
8 oz. good quality dark chocolate chopped
6 large egg yolks
1 C whole milk
1/2 C sugar
A pinch of salt
1 C heavy cream
1 – 11.2 oz bottle of Guinness
1 tsp vanilla extract
Check it out, my apron has a tiiiiny little pocket for my phone.
1. For best results, freeze your ice cream barrel(s) for at least 48 hours. If the instructions say something less, the manufacturer’s probably lying to you.
2. Roughly chop the chocolate and put it in a bowl big to hold all the ingredients. (It’s supposed to be finely chopped, but it doesn’t really matter for this recipe.)
3. Put a fine strainer over the chocolate bowl. Set aside.
4. Separate the yolks from the whites – the yolks into a medium sized heat-proof bowl and the whites into tupperware for the fridge. (I save the whites for macarons or egg-white omlets and the egg shells for my garden.) Whisk yolks together. Set aside.
FYI, best hot chocolate EVER.
1. Put the milk, sugar, salt in a medium saucepan. Warm on stove.
2. Whisking continuously, slowly ladle the warm milk mixture into the yolks to temper them. Keep whisking or you’ll end up with a boiled eggs mixture that’ll trigger your gag reflex. Ladle approximately ¾ of the milk mixture into the yolks. Then, scrape the tempered eggs back into the saucepan.
3. Stirring constantly, cook yolk mixture over medium-low heat. You can use a thermometer to bring it up to about 160-170 F/71-77 C (a tip from another David Lebovitz recipe) or you can wing it and warm the mixture just until it thickens enough to coat a spoon/spatula.
4. Once it’s the right temp/consistency, pour the custard through the strainer over the chocolate. Stir mixture until the chocolate’s melted and the mixture’s smooth.
5. Whisk in cream. Then add the Guinness and vanilla.
How do you like THAT? A lot, I hope, because it was difficult to simultaneously cook and take that many pictures of myself cooking.
6. Put the mixture over an ice bath, stirring every half hour until cooled … or ‘til you run out of ice.
7. Pop mixture in fridge. Chill overnight (~12 hours).
8. Follow ice cream maker’s instructions. Notes: Let the ice cream churn 10 minutes longer than whatever the instructions say for a creamier texture. Do not fill the barrels more than ¾ full during the churning process.
Ta daaaa: ICE CREAM!
When serving, take the ice cream out to thaw for 10-15 minutes, depending on how long it’s been in the freezer.
A few notes about homemade ice cream:
I love making ice cream. I love eating ice cream. I love thinking and talking about ice cream, but the texture is so damn delicate. Ice crystals start cropping up as soon as it goes in the freezer. Then, the process of thawing and re-freezing exacerbates the problem. Much as I hate to admit it, in the absence of stabilizers and specially calibrated freezers, it seems impossible to preserve the quality of homemade ice cream. It means I have to finish off the ice cream I serve as quickly as possible … at least that’s what I tell people. I suppose packing smaller batches of ice cream so I only thaw bits at a time works as well … but it’s not as fun.